Change and Roots

I've been thinking a lot lately about the whole season changing thing - which many people are, the winter has given way to spring (in most parts of the country, at least!) and summer break for my girls is a miniscule 5 weeks away (seriously?!?).  Gulp.

But, I digress.

One year ago, a season was most definitely coming to an end for us as our time in Colorado was being abruptly ended and our lives were taking a serious turn.  I remember blogging back then about the promise of new life as I gazed out my tree house window from my office to the aspen trees that were sprouting bright green life from beneath the layer of snow they were bearing.  Spring was showing itself amongst the familiar sites of the past several months of winter.  And we were planning our departure from the mountain tops (where we wanted to be) to the desert valley (where we most definitely did not).

I've written about it before (I hope not ad nauseam) - we were having to put down our dreams, say goodbye to some dear, lifelong friends, lay down our professional and volunteer responsibilities, clear out our closets (and drawers, and garage, and on and on), build a dream deck for someone else to enjoy, and otherwise hang up our life as we knew it.  It was hard and it was sometimes wrought with unbearable pain.

And I think about that season and I'm sick to my stomach and tearful all over again.  The desperation to deny what we knew was coming, the anger, the sorrow, the full-on pain of it.  But, somehow, we got through that really tough time - just putting one foot in front of the other.  Step by step by step.  (with many incidents of falling down and running backward, only to realize that it is in the forward moving that healing is ushered in)

The past two weeks have been a whirlwind for me.  I have, over the past several months, been feeling a call to do more, give more, somehow be more than what I have been since we've made our home in the desert (which is turning out to be a pretty decent place, after all).  Up until now, what that is has alluded me, and I've felt compelled to be still and wait.  I think it now has a name, and I'm accepting this challenge and opportunity with open arms - I'm ready to begin growing again.  The season for simply surviving seems to be passing.

But, it is all around us.  This week was one of loss for two friends - both had a parent pass away - both from chronic disease.  They are now plunged into a season of grief and pain as they try to adjust to a new normal.  Another friend had a big dream die, and she's disappointed and sad and angry because she doesn't understand why.  Another is struggling with moving her family in a few short weeks overseas for a bigger mission, and she talks about how hard it is to pull up roots.  Another just did that very thing and writes about how difficult it is to be away from everything she's ever known.  And sometimes the weight of it all seems like it will crush us.

Then, I remember what I learned in my latest season of trial.  The healing is in the journey and the journey is a process - one foot in front of the other, step by step by step.  Breaking big things off into littler, more manageable pieces seems to make it all that easier to bear - even the heaviest of loads.

And, although it seems so much easier to place our roots in shallow, clear water that will simply allow survival (and make future uprooting painless), it's not until those same roots make contact with the dirty soil - rocks, worms and all - that growth and balance and true nourishment occurs. 

Tonight I heard a familiar verse that had particular meaning for me as I contemplate past trials and upcoming challenges - Isaiah 55:8-9:

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
       neither are your ways my ways,"
       declares the LORD.

  "As the heavens are higher than the earth,
       so are my ways higher than your ways
       and my thoughts than your thoughts. 

I hope that speaks to you, whatever storm you are in, just coming out of, or just about to enter into.  Just keep putting one foot in front of the other, step by step by step.  One day, you'll look up and realize just how far you've come and maybe even see where you're going.

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

2 Corinthians 12:9-10

 

You know you live in Vegas when...

This weekend, we had family visiting us here in Las Vegas. Our girls were thrilled to spend ample time swimming in the hotel pool where our family stayed, and playing the wii in the hotel lobby. We spent considerable time at this particular hotel over the last several days.

Now that life has returned to normal, I thought I'd blog about my latest "you know you live in Vegas when..." moment.

We were headed to the pool from the fourth floor room my family was inhabiting for the weekend and both girls were excitedly running toward the elevators. My youngest said to my oldest, "it's my turn!" (to push the buttons) and my oldest said, "ok," then turned to me to explain that she and her sister were "taking turns working the elevators this weekend."

I then caught a sideways glance from my family member (who does not live in Vegas), and cracked up when he said, "I'll bet that's said outside of many an elevator here in Vegas!"

LOL!! Touche.

But, my daughters are waaaaay too young to have any idea what he meant - and I'm going to work to keep it that way!

Something Beautiful

So, today I went for a long run by myself on the incredible pathways that string through my neighborhood.  The weather was a balmy 62 degrees, the sun was shining, the wind was silent, and all was right with the world.  Something about the rhythm of my feet hitting the pavement and the sound of my breath invigorates me (after about the first mile or two...), and the endorphins kick in.  There's nothing like the high of a runner, something I never ever got until I became one.

As I was running, there were several moments when I looked up to notice the awesome views of the desert mountains rising up at the edge of the city and the monumental palm trees that rise to the sky to greet the sun.  How lucky I am to see all of this right here where I live.  I used to feel the same way when I had the privilege of staring in awe at Pikes Peak in Colorado - we've definitely been blessed to live in some beautiful places.

The thing is, I suppose there is beauty to be found everywhere and anywhere you look.  Even in Vegas, a place where many believe there is nothing beautiful (if you believe this, you've never really seen the true Las Vegas).  I'm so lucky to see the beauty here and to have the chance to enjoy it and add it to my past experiences with gorgeous landscape.

As I coming home after my run this morning, this song came on the radio.  I thought it summed it up pretty well, and I hope it inspires you to look for the beauty in your day today, too.