This is a test...

So, we went to see the movie _Up_ yesterday (incredible film, btw) - you really should see it. Beautiful and full of relevant life lessons and great messages.

So, there was this one scene (don't worry, I won't spoil anything) when the main character has to make a choice. A choice that is between something that is deeply important to him (understandably) and something that should be deeply important to all of us, but something the character isn't all that attached to, comparatively speaking.

At that moment, I was really (I mean, REALLY) identifying with the main character and his dilemma. I got so wrapped up in his situation that I lost sight of what the right choice was. I had to actually ask myself what it was and I wasn't sure for a moment. Well, in the spirit of total honesty, I asked myself because my 7 year old daughter was talking in my ear and asked me, "Momma, what is the right choice?" In that moment, I really wasn't sure, and as I write this, I'm baffled and amazed at how easily and completely I lost sight of truth and the stark difference between right and wrong. My judgement was clouded, just like the character's was, because of my own human emotion and selfishness.

I found myself saying the same things the character in the movie was - "I didn't ask for this!" and "It's none of my concern!" when faced with the consequences that would fall upon one of the other characters if I, ahem, the main character chose what he really wanted. It doesn't help that I've faced a very similar loss lately to the one he was facing if he chose against his desires - he would be giving up his home where all his memories were made. I mean, I was really feeling for the poor guy, ahem, myself (once again!).

I was shaken abruptly back into reality when my daughter answered her own question, saying, "the right choice is A because that is really more important than B, right momma?" (she did not say 'A' and 'B', I'm omitting the details so as not to spoil the movie for you!) A was the universally important choice, the one that valued the life and well-being of another character, and B was the personally important choice to the main character. My 7 year old knew the answer right away after considering the options, and I did not until she told me how she came to that conclusion! It was such an 'Aha' moment. I think I told her like 10 times how she was right, that 'A' was absolutely the right choice. Almost as though repeating it would forever etch it in my own brain so I'd never forget that again!

I'm not sure whether to be more overwhelmed with complete pride for my daughter, who obviously has absorbed some truth and is learning to filter real life through that truth, or with complete horror over my own sudden amnesia about that same truth because of my personal struggle with materialism and wanting to put my needs before others'.

I was reminded of this scene this morning while reading my devotional, which spoke about how we are put to the test time and time again in this life with the purpose of learning to do the right thing, rather than just saying what we'll do if faced with certain circumstances. Our true character is shown by what we do, not by just what we say we'll do.

This is a test.

I want to pass the way my daughter did yesterday.

Well done, Aubrielle.

Our day at the beach

I'm FINALLY getting some shots uploaded from last weekend when we were at the beach. Enjoy! (Makes me want to go back this weekend...) :)

A BIG HUGE THANK YOU to Aunt Keri and Herb for making our stay on the beach possible for Father's Day! :) We had an awesome time!

Trying hard NOT to pray for patience, but...

I need it!! Where did mine go? It seems like it's completely dried up altogether these days.

Earlier this week I was talking with a friend about how we should be careful what we pray for - because we just might get it. I'm so tempted to pray for the peace that patience would seemingly bring, but I know that in the past that hasn't worked out so well for me. I end up facing more situations that require me to develop more patience. In the long term, this would be helpful, but not so much in the here and now.

I guess what I need to pray for today is the peace that I'm longing for. The absence of feeling annoyed and tired of the same parental remarks I'm repeating untold times throughout each day (like, "stop chewing on that," "be nice to your sister," and "no, I didn't tell you it was ok to give the cat a bath").

Sigh. Raising children is hard work.

And we have success...

I can cross one thing off my 'to do' list after we moved, today we found a great pediatrician!! Saw him to get a couple of vaccinations the local school districts require for registration. (Believe it or not, Bri actually giggled nervously through both shots!) I thought the doctor was great, and he even told me that he could recommend the pediatric dentist he takes his kids to here. (Maybe even two things can get crossed off??)

It is nice to have something go smoothly - and on the first try. Just thought I'd report - I needed a boost today, and I think this was it. :) Oh, and yesterday, my long awaited Dyson arrived!! I've never been so excited to vacuum - ever. It's the little things...

Hopefully you are finding little things to revel in this week!

Time flies...

Wow! Has it already been a whole week since I last blogged?? Time is slipping away from me. Seems there is lots of exploring to do and as it turns out, two young children are hungry for my attention now that school's out and we're in a new environment. But, it's been good.

We've had a steady diet of visiting parks, some with spray parks built in, some just utilized for their pathways while we bike ride (Bri is now riding without training wheels, which was previously not achieved because of the mountainous area we used to call home = not so safe for learning to ride a bike).

We spent Father's Day at the beach in California - a quick weekend road trip to Huntington Beach, west of LA. What a fun time! It is so much fun to brave the strong ocean waves and marvel at just how amazingly huge the sea is and just how small we are. We had a great time with the children - this was Denali's first time at the coast (that she can remember). During the ride out, she kept asking when we were getting to the pool - that was her frame of reference, and we DID have swimming suits! Bri and Kyle got boogy boards and rode some waves. We had a nice dinner at a local Italian restaurant and strolled home (to the hotel) on the beach in our dress clothes. While it was a little chillier than we've been used to (it was 60-70 degrees the whole time we were there), it was a welcome break from the heat of the desert.

Yesterday, I broke down and decided it was time to end the denial and finally register Bri for school here. We got ready, then gathered up the various paperwork they required from us and went over to the school, only to be told that Bri is missing a vaccination?!? Funny, no one ever mentioned that before to me... So, we were turned away (again) and told to get the shot and come back. Seriously?

This required that I find a pediatrician ASAP, which is something that is on my to do list, but I thought I'd have a little more time for that... Anyway, we have that appt. this afternoon.

So, in a not so neat nutshell, that is what we've been up to. It's a wonder how the busyness of daily life can take over - especially at a time when I was just sure I'd be bored and wondering what to do with myself. HA!

A few shots...

Here are a few photos of the girls in our first couple of weeks here in our new city. Enjoy!

Revenge

Do you ever face a situation (over and over and over again) that makes you want to forget everything you know about what you "should" do and just do what you want? What would make you feel good? And make the offender feel really really really bad - because they DESERVE it?

I'm having one of those moments and am daydreaming about what I can do to bring misery and suffering to someone who seems to delight in bringing that to me and my family. Someone who is motivated by greed and is willing to lie and steal to feed their own ego and avert all personal responsibility.

But, I know better than to plot revenge. And when I resume my composure in a few minutes, I'll recall that God said vengeance is His. I'm sure whatever He dishes out will match the reprehensible crimes committed against me and my husband.

Wait. That goes for me and all my offenses too...

never mind.

Quote to ponder for today

So, I read this quote by Francis Bacon today that really hit home...

"They are ill discoverers that think there is no land, when they see nothing but sea."

Well, I'm determined to be no "ill discoverer"!! :)

Loneliness

Here, where I sit today, I'm a tad bit lonely. We are new to this city and although there are tons of families with young children here (I've seen them with my own eyes!), it does seem as though everyone is too busy to make new friends. They've already got some - as evidenced by the hugs and pocket conversations going on all around us - in church, at parks, in restaurants.

I look longingly at other groups of people who are so engrossed in catching up with one another and wish we could find some other families that are as lonely as we are to talk with, make playdates with, and otherwise get to know. (I am much more concerned about this than Kyle is, in the spirit of complete honesty!).

I don't know what I expected - maybe for a few women to simply appear in my path, you know, the kind who once you talk for a little while you feel like you've known them all your life? The kind who make you feel at home, and are easy to be around? The ones with kids around the same ages as mine, who might even be interested in a new running partner? Not that I've given it much thought, or anything! :) These women have proven elusive so far (although it's only been two weeks...).

In the meantime, yesterday I got a phone call from a friend back in Colorado checking in with me. We talked and I shared my heart with her. This morning brought an instant message conversation with another friend and a phone call from yet another. I told both of them, too, about my sorrow over not finding any women here to befriend. Then, I got an email from another wonderful woman just checking in with me to see how I am doing. Several others have been sending invitations for me to join their network on a popular social network site (which, until today, I've been trying to avoid for fear of being literally sucked into my computer).

Are you catching a theme here? It took me all morning to realize what is happening. I've been so caught up in my own private little pity party to get that God is showing me how there are plenty of lifelong friends in my life already. They just don't happen to be in the same city anymore, and may not look exactly like the specific expectations I had for them. They are there, and all this technology exits to make them readily available to me, to support me and encourage me - and for me to be all of that to them.

Which brings me to my second profound realization of the day... If I'm feeling this lonely and all it takes is for someone else to pick up the phone, send a quick email, shoot a brief IM, smile and strike up a conversation, what is preventing me from being that person? What is keeping me from being the one to get outside my comfort zone and take a risk with another woman here in my city? Pride, fear, whatever it is... It is a strong pull, but I can't be the only one who feels alone in a city of hundreds of thousands (many of whom are new to this area, too, by looking at the demographics).

I need to digest and accept that this may not just fall into place, it may actually take me doing some work to get to the place I want to be. sigh I'm going to make a pledge to reach out to one other person today. It may make all the difference for them - I know it would (and has) to me. What if we all did that? What if you did?

Without the rain, you would wither

So, I was reading in my _Streams in the Desert_ devotional today, and the passage was about how storms in life are trying, but necessary, for without them, we would scarcely ever notice the blessings they bring in the aftermath. The author spoke about a midwestern storm that was devastating, uprooting trees, damaging property, and dark and violent. She describes the winds blowing the storm away after it hit, and watching it retreat, leaving rainbows in its wake. She describes how for weeks following the storm, there were flowers unlike most summers in the fields that year, how the grass was greener because of the moisture, and the trees were fuller, casting more restful shade in the heat of the day.

That's just how it is with us, too. We weather the most difficult storms life has to offer and when it is all over, although we are facing trials and challenges in our recovery, we are also better equipped to see the blessings around us. I've noticed things in my own life now, as I'm recovering from this last year of storms, that I have no doubt would have gone completely unnoticed without the struggles. The grass does seem greener, the flowers more fragrant and beautiful.

Although I write this from a warm, sunny perch here in Nevada, I know that my friends in Colorado are weathering what has been weeks of rainy and unseasonably cold weather there. I hope this is encouragement to all of you, that the storms will subside eventually, and what you'll be left with then will be such a blessing. Hang in there! It's worth the wait.

Things I'm learning about the desert...

So, after a week and a couple days of living here in the desert, I'm learning a few things.  Having always lived in a mountainous climate (grew up in Wyoming, spent the last decade in Colorado), I now know that I've been pretty limited in my experiences.  Here are a few of the things I'm learning here in the desert of Nevada:

~ 80 degree weather in June is referred to by the local weather forecaster as "springtime that won't go away" and is believed to be inclimate.  Low temps in the 60s are unheard of past May, apparently...

~ Frozen yogurt joints are on every corner and may actually do more business than Starbucks (?!?)

~ Leaving children or pets in your parked car for ANY amount of time actually could put their lives in serious danger (not that this is something I do, but I'm just saying)

~ Cockroaches (and ants, and the occasional scorpion) are a fact of life, as is the quest to rid your home and yard of them.  :(  (I've found a serious hobby in this as of late)

~ Making my family get used to sleeping in 60 degree temps to save money on heating bills is a thing of the past.  Now I'm making them get used to sleeping in 80 degree temps to save on A/C bills!

~ Our children cannot get enough of running through the grass in our backyard.  (When Kyle mentioned this to a coworker, his response was to ask what Kyle was talking about - he said, "we live in the desert, there is no grass here!"  Could have fooled us Colorado mountain folk!)

~ There is no life without A/C.  Seriously - you could die.

Gifts

So, I've noticed that there has been alot of reference in my life here and there to certain themes - usually a lesson I'm learning at any given time.  Invariably, I'll notice that whatever it is I'm going through (and the corresponding lesson) is brought up for me in many different and creative ways, I'll watch a movie related to the theme, I'll feel drawn to books on the topic, or books I'm already drawn to will touch on the topic at hand, people in my life will bring it up at seemingly random times, etc.  I've come to learn that this will continue until I digest and incorporate whatever it is into my way of life, change my behavior or thoughts about certain things, or something changes in some way.

The theme I'm currently focused on, in particular, is to ask and believe God for great things, even above all my expectations and dreams.  I've had a friend mention this concept to me (more than once), I've read about it lately in more than one book, I've heard a couple of sermons on the topic.  All that to say, I feel like God is hitting me over the head with that idea right now - not to just expect Him to choose the time and place (He will, anyway) to lavish a gift or two upon me without my asking, but to take the time to ask Him to, and expect Him to answer in ways that I couldn't have predicted (meaning, beyond my expectations, and generously - more than I could possibly deserve).

I've had some tough breaks over the past year (I know I'm not the only one!).  I've gone through some loss, some change, some heartache.  I've asked for some things, been given them, then had them taken away in a heartbeat.  I had come to believe that I shouldn't ask for anything and just be content with what I already have (not that there's anything wrong with that).  But, my lesson, specifically, I think, is to learn to depend wholly on the Lord, in good times and in bad, in plenty and in want.  It is only then that I will truly get just how much He loves me, has provided for me, and wants to surround me with His grace and generosity.  If I don't recognize the gifts, how can I possibly notice the giver?

So, I'm timidly stepping out a little bit and asking for some great things.  I don't know if He'll see fit to give them to me, but I'm asking, which is a big step for me right now.  He already knows all of my needs - He knows them better than I do.  And I'm learning that in this relationship with Him, He expects me to come to Him with my joys and my needs.  So, I'm trying.  I suppose this is a lifelong process, and I know He won't honor every request I make of Him.

Something hit me yesterday as we were singing in our new church home yesterday, and I thought I'd share it with you.  As I was marveling at our new beautiful church full of people and families with young children, at the incredible talent of those who were leading worship, at the powerful message given by the pastor, at the new youth pastor who attended yesterday with his wife for the first time after moving here and all that having a youth pastor would bring to the congregation (we've never been involved in a church with a youth pastor on staff before!), at the 85 degree weather we've been enjoying after leaving a rainy and somewhat cold Colorado springtime, at the sounds of the exotic birds that sing here all day long in the desert, at the palm trees, at the multitude of parks, paths, pools, and community centers that dot our city - it hit me.

He's lavished untold gifts upon Kyle and I and our children already.  I didn't ask for all of this.  He just gave it to us.  I took it all for granted until I realized that being here wasn't our choice, and in every way we've felt like it's been chosen for us.  That's the point.  He chose this for us, and while I know the road will not be always smooth and trouble free, I'm getting a small taste of just how much He wants to bless His children.  I'm so glad that I'm one of them.

We made it!

Hello from Las Vegas (baby!)!  :)  We're here, and we're all in one piece!

Sorry for the lack of blogging over the past week, it was a crazy one.  Between packing and working and parenting and driving across four state lines to get here, we had alot going on!  

We left Colorado on Saturday after three loooooooong days of packing up our moving truck.  Our intention was to leave "first thing" Saturday morning, but with packing left to do on Friday night, we decided to call it quits around 11 pm because we just couldn't take it anymore - we were exhausted.  So, we got up early Saturday and started again.  By the time we got everything packed up and we were ready to finally leave, it was 6 pm!!  Whoa.  We were a little optimistic when we planned to leave early!  I told Kyle, at least we were within a 24 hour span in our estimation!!

So, we drove as far as we could that night in the rain, over mountain passes, and stayed overnight in Eagle, CO.  The next day (Sunday), we got on the road at 7 am, and didn't arrive in Nevada until 8 pm.  At which point, we unloaded the truck enough to get to our beds and we collapsed around midnight.

The past two days have been spent unloading our moving truck in amazing heat - it was 95 degrees yesterday here.  The girls have spent much time running through the sprinkler (what a novelty for them!) while we are busily trying to make our house a home (and one that we can walk through without injury!).  

There is still unpacking to do, so while Kyle has returned to work today, I'll try to tackle some of that and keep the girls entertained at the same time.  The busyness is dying down some, and I'm thankful for that.  I'll write a little more later about some of my impressions as we are making this transition physically.  For now, I am off to unpack, and wanted to let you all know that we did make it, and we're doing good, so far!  Thanks for your patience, and I'll post again soon.  :)